I Take Care of Everyone But ME!

So many women today, including myself, see themselves as caretakers. They take care of their children, even when they’re grown, they take care of their partners, they take care of parents, siblings, friends, neighbors and coworkers. The one person they never take care of is themselves!

I have people in my life whom I love dearly that would go 100 miles out of their way to take care of a family member or friend, but never do a thing for themselves. Many women actually feel guilty if they take time for themselves, or spend money on themselves. They feel that they’re being selfish.

What these women don’t understand is that we all only have a finite amount of time and energy, and when we spend all that time and energy on other people, we don’t have enough left to nurture us. What they need to recongize is that taking time for ourselves, and doing things to make our own lives a little better, is NOT selfish, and the more we nurture ourselves, the more we have to give to others.

Taking care of YOU is a win-win situation. You feel better, you feel more at peace, you feel energized, and all of that is reflected to those around you.

Sometimes little things can mean a lot. It could be that for you personally, an hour with a good book and a cup of gourmet coffee will leave you refreshed, relaxed and revitalized. Maybe all it takes is a nice hot bubble bath and some soothing music. Whatever it is that it takes to re-energize you, you need to take that time out of your life to focus on yourself.

How many times have you found yourself feeling overwhelmed and frustrated that you never seem to have a minute to yourself? You have to take the initiative to MAKE that time. Can you tuck the kids in for a nap and take that bubble bath? Can you make a quick trip to the bookstore, between other errands, to pick up that book that you’ve been dying to read?

Even if your answer is that you’re way to busy, it’s time to make YOU a priority in your life! You don’t think twice about giving your time to others, so why think twice about giving equal time to you? Get rid of those feelings of guilt and selfishness, because it’s way past time to put yourself at the top of your list!

I’m providing the tapping script below in the hope that it will aid you in making yourself a priority.

Karate chop:

• Even though I have time in my life to take care of everyone else, I never seem to have time to take care of me, and I’m tired of being at the bottom of my own list, and I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.
• Even though I put a lot of time and energy into taking care of other people, I always forget about myself, and I don’t know how much longer I can keep doing that, and I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.
• Even though my bucket of energy is getting mighty low, and I feel like I’m running out of steam, I’m considering that maybe if I do something nice for me, I’ll feel better about everything, and I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.

Eyebrow: I take care of everyone else
Side of eye: But I don’t take care of myself
Under eye: It takes a lot of energy to take care of everyone else
Under nose: And I feel like my energy is running out
Chin: Everyone looks to me to take care of them
Under arm: And I do that willingly and with love
Top of head: But I never take time out for me.

Eyebrow: I’m running out of energy
Side of eye: And just can’t keep going this way
Under eye: Starting to focus on ME
Under nose: If I don’t take care of myself
Chin: I’ll have nothing left to give
Collar bone: Choosing to make myself a priority
Under arm: Recognizing that it’s important to make time for ME
Top of head: Making a commitment to nurture myself.

Eyebrow: Taking some time out of my schedule
Side of eye: To focus on my own needs
Under eye: There isn’t anything selfish about taking care of me
Under nose: Finding things to do that make me feel good
Chin: Being as nice to myself as I am to others
Collar bone: Letting go of the belief that I can’t take time for me
Under arm: *I* am important
Top of head: Making sure that I’m at the top of my own priority list.

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EFT and the Dentist

Nobody enjoys going to the dentist. It’s something that we all know we have to do, but most of us dread. Even routine dental work can evoke an “oh, no!” feeling in a lot of us.

I suspect that a lot of people had experiences similar to those that I had as a child. My parents took me to a kindly old dentist (and I DO mean old!) whose equipment was so old that what should have been white was yellow. He always said the same thing: “This won’t hurt a bit.”, but it often did hurt. I learned not to believe him, and that distrust extended to every other dentist, for my entire life.

Dentistry has made great strides over the years, and there usually is no pain or discomfort associated with it, but there is always that fear in the back of my head..fear of the pain that I’m sure must be forthcoming.

Having that kind of anxiety about going to the dentist makes it mighty hard to even make an appointment. Just thinking about calling puts my stomach in a knot, and the feeling of dread sneaks in, and I find myself avoiding making that appointment.

When I finally do find the courage to call, I show up for my appointment with my stomach queasy, and my muscles in knots from the tension. Sitting in my dentist’s waiting room is the last place I want to be (except for in his chair, of course!), but there I am, and a part of me is itching to jump up and run out the door.

Since EFT became a part of my life, I’ve found that the anxiety, fear and dread can all be very effectively neutralized. That’s not to say that I’ll ever enjoy visiting the dentist, but at least I can do so without having to fight the urge to run away.

If you dread the dentist too, I’m hoping that the tapping script below will be of help to you.

Karate chop:

Even though I dread going to the dentist, and just thinking about making an appointment stresses me out, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.

Even though I’m really scared of the dentist hurting me, and that fear just kind of takes me over, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.

Even though thinking about the dentist working on me is enough to send me into a panic, and I can feel the fear all the way down to my toes, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.

Eyebrow: I’m really scared of the dentist
Outside eye: I hate going there
Under eye: I just know it’s going to hurt
Under nose: Nobody can tell me different
Chin: Going to the dentist is very scary
Collar bone: And I’d rather not do it
Under arm: Thinking of the dentist puts my stomach in a knot
Top of head: You can’t make me go to the dentist!

Eyebrow: I’m afraid of the pain
Outside eye: But maybe there won’t be any
Under eye: I KNOW it will hurt
Under nose: But maybe it won’t
Chin: All this anxiety and fear about the dentist
Collar bone: All this fear of the fear
Under arm: Choosing to release that fear and anxiety
Top of head: Letting go of it, a little at a time.

Eyebrow: Releasing that fear of the dentist
Outside eye: Letting go of my fear of the pain
Under eye: Doing what I need to do
Under nose: In order to take care of my teeth
Chin: Trusting that the dentist won’t hurt me
Collar bone: Feeling more comfortable with this all the time
Under arm: Transforming that fear and anxiety
Top of head: Into an energy of peace and healing.

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Building Self Esteem With EFT

Low self esteem is a common issue in our world today. We all seem to be able to find a million reasons why what we’re doing isn’t good enough, or why we don’t measure up, but we have a lot more trouble seeing the good in ourselves.

It’s true for me, and for most people I know, that we are our own harshest critics. We’re harder on ourselves than we would ever be on someone that we care about.

We all have self talk, and for far too many of us that self talk is critical and judgemental. How many times have you caught yourself making some kind of silly mistake, and then saying to yourself internally “You big idiot!”? It’s something that I’ve done all my life, although I find myself much more aware of that behavior these days.

It is in our own best interests to work on learning to see the good in ourselves, however difficult that may be for some of us. EFT is the perfect tool for doing something like that. The following tapping script was written to help us in focusing on our positive qualities, and letting go of all the negative self talk.

Karate chop:

Even though it’s sometimes hard for me to remember that I’m a good person, and I tend to look at all I see wrong with me instead of all that’s right with me, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.

Even though I seem to have a little voice in my head that keeps reminding me that I’m not good enough and never quite measure up, I choose to start looking at all the good parts of me, and I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.

Even though I often have trouble seeing myself as a good person or a worthwhile person, and I’m usually way too hard on myself, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself, and I’m choosing to recognize all the wonderful parts of me.

Eyebrow: I’m not a good enough person
Side of eye: And I’m always beating myself up because of that
Under eye: There isn’t a whole lot that I like about me
Under nose: But there’s plenty that I don’t like
Chin: I never seem to measure up
Collar bone: I don’t feel good about myself at all
Under arm: But I’m choosing to start working on feeling better about me.
Top of head: And bringing healing to this situation.

Eyebrow: I don’t feel like a worthwhile person
Side of eye: But I could be wrong about that
Under eye: I feel like I don’t do anything right
Under nose: But I’m open to considering that I could be wrong about that too
Chin: Starting to release those feelings of not being good enough
Collar bone: And to embrace all that is good about me
Under arm: Choosing to see all my good points
Top of head: And to leave behind that feeling of unworthiness.

Eyebrow: Working on seeing all the good things about me
Side of eye: Realizing what a strong person I am
Under eye: And what a good and worthwhile person I am
Under nose: Feeling good about the authentic me
Chin: Letting go of all those feelings of not being good enough
Collar bone: Releasing the feelings of not measuring up
Under arm: Letting those unworthy feelings just slip away
Top of head: And just feeling good about who I am

Back to Seeking Serenity.

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My Kids Are Driving Me Crazy!

Every parent has days during which their children drive them to the verge of insanity. They’re just being kids, and doing what kids do, but that’s not always easy for parents to handle.

I can clearly remember when my son was 2 years old, and I called my sister in tears, because my son woke up before me, took an entire tube of toothpaste, and squeezed it all around the toilet seat. I was 3/4 asleep, and never even noticed the toothpaste, so I sat down right on it. YUCK!!! Not a good way to start the day.

If you’re raising children, those days are inevitable, but you don’t have to stay half crazed if you use EFT. For your tapping pleasure, here is a sample tapping script for the days when your kids drive you crazy.

Setup: (Karate chop)

• Even though my kids are driving me crazy and I’m having trouble staying in control of my temper, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.
• Even though my kids are doing things that try my patience, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.
• Even though my kids are getting on my last nerve, and are pushing me to the limit, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself, and I’m reminding myself that they’re just being kids!

Eyebrow: Feeling frustrated that my kids are driving me nuts!
Side of eye: I just can’t take this any more
Under eye: I’m feeling like I might lose my temper
Under nose: And I’m finding it hard to remember
Chin: That they’re only being kids
Collar bone: So much frustration and anger
Under arm: Feeling really upset with my kids
Top of head: And with the way they’re behaving.

Eyebrow: So frustrated with my kids
Side of eye: They know how to push my buttons
Under eye: But maybe I need to find some peace with this
Under nose: And start to let go of the frustration
Chin: They’re just doing what kids do
Collar bone: Same as I did when I was young
Under arm: Maybe I’m over-reacting
Top of head: Letting go of that frustration.

Eyebrow: Letting the frustration just flow away
Side of eye: Replacing it with peace and acceptance
Under eye: Focusing on the love I feel for my kids
Under nose: And how much they mean to me
Chin: Feeling good about those positive emotions
Collar bone: Letting go of the negative
Under arm: Transforming all the frustration and anger
Top of head: Into an energy of healing and peace.

Now go give your kids a big hug and tell that that you love them!

Back to Seeking Serenity.

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EFT and My Scaredy Cat

I am the proud and loving owner of 3 cats. Two of them are calm and sedate animals whose favorite way to pass time is sleeping. My third cat is the scaredy cat that we’ve all heard about. She is skittish and scared of her own shadow. The slightest noise sends her running under the bed, or into the closet, where she may stay for hours.

We’ve had a lot of thunder storms and bad weather recently in my neck of the woods, and I’ve watched as my already scared cat became progressively more scared with each storm. This morning we had a fine storm, with lots of booming thunder, and I watched as my scaredy cat’s eyes got as large as saucers. Seeing the panic in her face, I knew that was past time to deal with her issues.

She bolted for the closet, so holding her in my lap, which is usually how I tap for my cats, was not an option, so I did some surrogate tapping in her behalf.

“Even though I’m really scared of all those loud noises, and it makes me just want to hide in a safe place, I don’t really need to be afraid, because it’s just noises, and I’m a good cat”.

“Even though I hate all that loud booming, and it makes me afraid that something bad will happen to me, so I run and hide, I’m a good cat, and maybe I don’t need to be scared of those booms.”

“Even though I only feel safe under the bed or in the closet when all that booming starts, maybe I don’t really need to run and hide, and maybe I’m perfectly safe, and I’m a really good cat.”

• Those loud noises really scare me.
• I just don’t feel safe.
• Something bad is going to happen to me
• If I don’t run and hide.
• All that booming is scarey
• Maybe it can hurt me somehow
• I just really need to be in a safe place
• Like the closet or under the bed.

• Those loud noises are so scarey
• But maybe they really can’t hurt me
• The booms make me want to run and hide
• But maybe I don’t really need to
• Those noises make my heart pound
• But maybe there’s nothing to worry about
• Scarey loud booming noises
• But all they are is noise, and I’m safe.

• No need to run and hide
• I’m safe right where I am
• Loud noises can’t hurt me
• Even though they sound scarey
• I’m going to stay calm
• I’m in a safe place
• I don’t have any reason to hide
• And I’m a really good cat!

Three rounds of tapping and I saw a little kitty face peering around the side of the closet door. Three more rounds, and out came my scaredy cat, jumping up on the bed next to me.

Now that I could get her in my lap, I did a couple of more rounds, and by the end of the second round, my girl was sound asleep in my lap.

Back to Seeking Serenity.

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Me Exercise? NO WAY!!!

Like many of my friends, I am at a stage in my life where I am aware on a daily basis of the limitations of my aging body. Many things that I used to love to do, I can no longer do, which is a difficult thing to admit.

As I’ve aged, I’ve become less and less physically active. I KNOW that’s not good for me, and I KNOW I should be moving around more, but it usually doesn’t happen. At least some of that has to do with worn out joints and arthritis, and the resulting pain when I overdo anything of a physical nature.

Ten years ago I exercised every day. I was proud of the fact that I did, and I know that the exercise helped me to lose weight, and kept my body more flexible. Back then, though, it didn’t hurt to exercise. It often does now. For me personally, that discourages me from doing what I know I should be doing.

I play a mental game with myself. “I need to get on the stationary bike now.” .. “But my knees have sure been bothering me.” .. “It’s so hard to ride when I’m hurting.” .. “I think I’ll skip it for today.” For me, there is always a reason not to exercise!

I have made a promise to myself to start working on this huge block I have about exercise. With that in mind, I’ve written an EFT tapping script for myself that I’m sharing with anyone else who needs to find the motivation that I haven’t found yet myself.

Setup:

Even though I really hate to exercise and I know that exercising usually hurts, and I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.

Even though exercise hurts, and that’s all the reason I need to not do it, even though I know it would be good for me, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself.

Even though I can think of a lot more reasons NOT to exercise than to go ahead and exercise, and it’s a lot easier to not push myself and my body, I deeply and profoundly love and accept myself, and I choose to consider that my attitude towards exercise needs some adjusting.

Reminders:

• Eyebrow: I don’t want to exercise
• Side of eye: It hurts when I exercise
• Under eye: I just don’t want to do it
• Under nose: And you can’t make me!
• Chin: It’s so much easier just to sit
• Collar bone: Then to get up and move my body
• Under arm: I don’t like being in pain
• Top of head: And I’m in pain when I exercise.

• Eyebrow: Doing exercise hurts
• Side of eye: But maybe I need to do it anyway
• Under eye: I don’t like the pain
• Under nose: But maybe it won’t hurt as much if I exercise more
• Chin: It’s hard on me to exercise
• Collar bone: But I know it’s really good for me
• Under arm: Maybe I would actually hurt less
• Top of head: If I exercised more.

• Eyebrow: Releasing that resistance to exercise
• Side of eye: Recognizing how much more healthy I’d be
• Under eye: If I exercised a little every day
• Under nose: Choosing to do the right thing for my body
• Chin: Knowing I’ll feel better if I exercise
• Collar bone: Promising myself to exercise every day
• Under arm: Letting go of all that exercise resistance
• Top of head: And replacing it with motivation to get moving and to get healthy

Back to Seeking Serenity.

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